What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
13.06.2025 01:16
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Why do I get spun and then want big fat cocks to suck?
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
If my lovely sister sleeps with my boyfriend, what should I do about her?
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
What was the craziest place that you had sex with someone in public?
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Make Nazis afraid again!
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Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
What are some of your favorite hip hop lyrics?
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
What will the legacy of Jimmy Carter be in light of his death today at 100?
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
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¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
TEXT:
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!